A bit of a walk, a bit of beachcombing...

Unfortunately I'm still not fully recovered from my biopsy the other week, contracting an infection has slowed things down slightly. I mean the wound itself has closed up nicely you would/will hardly be able to see the scar, well that's if I chose to show you as it's in a well shall we say sensitive area. I'm now on extra antibiotics (Amoxi-clav) after making an appointment to see the nurse up at my GP's practice. Still in quite a bit of discomfort because of the swollen area and I'm taking extra pain meds, just in the form of codeine to try and keep the pain at bay. It's not as bad as it was so that's good news.

Anyhoo I decided to give the old cycling a miss for a little while yet until I'm feeling fully sorted. Feels like ages since I've been out on my bike and I hate that as I know when I do come to go out my fitness will have deserted me yet again and I'll have to start all over from scratch. I suppose I should be used to it as my riding and fitness has always been up and down,due to one thing or another, mainly health concerns,broken bikes or indeed broken prosthetics. Never mind I always seem to bounce back and though I may not be the quickest or fittest bloke in the world no one can say I don't try and give it my best shot.

So like the heading says of my latest blog I decided to go for a bit of a walk and also do a spot of beach combing. Last year I had been scouring the beach down at Sunderland and towards South Shields for what I call nice bits of drift wood. My plan was to make something, maybe a sculpture of some sort, or even a nice candle holder or picture frame in which I could pop one of my coastal photo's of me out on my Fat Bike. I didn't have much luck finding any nice bits of wood last year really. Now I can put this down to a couple of reasons 1. When ever I got down to the beach the tractor had already beat me to it and cleared up the sands ready for visitors and 2. My OCD tendencies kicked in and I just couldn't find pieces of wood which passed my incredibly high standards of precision and perfectionism...I know screwed up as this is drift wood we are talking about here lol...Hey welcome to my world, it can be hard to be me some days ha ha.

Back to today's walk, well we started at South Shields, when I say we I mean Ern (my dad) who had tagged along and Mr Hinks my English Bull Terrier. We had a little stroll along the beach and soon discovered it was a bit brisk, also not much to be found on that section of the beach, so we headed back to our car and drove further up towards Little Haven, where we got out and went for a little more of a walk and look around. I stopped to take a few shots with my new mobile phone a Samsung Galaxy S3 and was pretty happy with a few of the photo's which I upped straight away from the device to Facebook after I had tweaked them using an app called Snapseed. Then we set off along the coastline in the car and found ourselves at Roker. Unfortunately the tide was right in so we couldn't get down onto the majority of the beach. On the bit we could manage to get on there were various pebbles, of which I chose a few nice ones that caught my eye (I bring them home and pop them in a large clear vase I have on our kitchen window sill, it will make a nice feature when it's full, well I think it will, all different shapes and sizes and colours of pebbles, oh and also some washed glass which reflects quite nicely. There was also quite a bit of drift wood though as I have said I'm really very picky and only 2 pieces passed my examination. Never mind I was chuffed as I think once it's cleaned and dried out I will be able to complete my picture frame. So watch out for a blog post of me exhibiting my handy work lol.

After completing the small loop of the beach we were freezing, so it was a case of returning to our car and cracking open the nice hot drinks and sandwiches I had prepared. Mmmm a lovely variety of jam and chocolate spread on fruit loaf, my speciality, washed down with nice hot coffee. Once warmed up as we really didn't have many other plans for the day we headed off for a walk around the marina at Sunderland. 

It was freezing, yet they were out at the sailing club

 I really enjoy being outdoors as you always meet nice folk to have a chat with on your travels, this can be whether your out cycling or just out for a walk and today was no exception. As we came around the footpath heading around towards the marina we came across a gentleman who was fishing. He was rubbing his hands together and like us was probably thinking "Boy is it cold today". As we got to him we struck up a conversation, basically asking " have ye been lucky 'nd caught oot like". To which he replied "ah just a few littlun's" which he had thrown back. Any-ways it turned out Dave I think his name was had just moved back home after living in South Africa since 1974. Both him and his wife had returned because it was just to dangerous living over there for security reasons and they had come back home to Sunderland. We enjoyed a good 15 to 20 mins chat I love hearing about other people lives and experiences. I suppose that's why I like working with the older patients in my new job, well those fortunate enough to be able to hold a conversation. They have such interesting, historical and at times magical tales to tell. 

 Eventually we got round the marina and completed our loop back to our car, by which time it was brassic and I couldn't feel my hands. Another quick slurp on some semi-warm coffee and we headed off home to pick up wor Kayleigh so as we could drop her off for work. I really don't know what she would do with out the assistance of "granddads taxi's". Saying which I'd be lost without my 2 best mates with whom though it wasn't quite as exciting as being out on my Fat bike with I still had an enjoyable time.

A story entitled "Learning to Live with Cancer"

The following short story is about a very brave family who have gone through so much turmoil, both emotionally and physically in their personal battle against Cancer.

Cameron contacted me some months back, telling me he had come upon my blog quite by chance and after reading posts I had written felt a certain symmetry in how we both explain ourselves,how we write, the experiences we have gone through and all the emotions,fears and feelings that we have undergone.

Cameron asked would I be willing to share just some of the experiences of his family in the form of a short story he wrote on my blog about his wife's terrible disease and I agreed immediately.

 The internet is a fantastic way to share ones experiences and in doing so if it can shed even the tiniest bit of light on someone who is suffering, well that's quite an achievement.


Learning to Live with Cancer

My wife often tells me that she doesn't know how I got through a life-changing event. When Heather was diagnosed with mesothelioma, I didn't know what to say or even what to do, but slowly things fell into place. I hope that by sharing my experience here, I can help someone else currently facing a similar situation. 

Three months before her diagnosis, we were in the hospital, celebrating the birth of our first and only child, Lily. With such great joy and excitement in our lives, it was hard to imagine the time that was to follow. Sitting in the doctor's office just a few months later, we experienced the worst moment of either of our lives. When the doctors told us that my wife had mesothelioma, I looked at Heather, tears welling up in her eyes, and could not imagine how we were ever going to get through this.

Overwhelmed, I went through a brief moment of breaking down, but her doctor’s rapid questions about future medical decisions we would be asked to make brought me back to the present. It was the first time of many more occasions where we would have to make choices under the stress of severe emotional upheaval. I can only thank Heather for being strong even when we both had doubts.

Right after the meeting with doctors, I only felt anger and fear, which would come out in unexpected ways, particularly when I was frustrated. I cussed, ranted and raged at the smallest things. I felt angry at the world for putting us in this impossible, unfair situation. I knew that I couldn't be like that, and it didn’t take long for me to realize how selfish I was being. For my wife and daughter, I had to be strong, and eventually, it began to set in that this was more than a passing moment. It was going to be many months, maybe years. I never wanted my wife to see how scared I was. From that moment on, I did my very best to be nothing but a source of hope and optimism for my wife.

Afteragnosis, my to-do list grew considerably, and I had to learn to cope with all these new responsibilities. I had to help raise Lily, take care of Heather, our pets, while also holding down my full time job and helping to plan travel arrangements, doctors appointments, and so much more. Being that overwhelmed, I often felt that I couldn't take one more thing added to the list. I learned to prioritize and make choices, taking the list on one item at a time in order of importance.  I also learned very quickly to accept help from anyone who offered. Without the incredible outpouring pport from our loving friends and family, I honestly don’t know how we would have made it through this difficult time.

 

After work on a Friday, I decided to drive to my wife and baby in South Dakota. It was an 11-hour drive through a snow storm. I slept on the side of the road at one point as the plows worked to clear the snow. I arrived on Saturday and spent the rest of the day with my family, as well as part of Sunday, before driving back for work on Monday. It was a lot of exhausting travel for a few precious hours of time with them, but it was worth every second.

I never look back on this time away from them with regret, as hard as it was. Instead, I see that we had to be strong and we had to cope in the way that was right for our family. With cancer, we had to make many difficult decisions that no one should ever have to make, but we learned not to despair in those decisions. Instead, we learned to take comfort in the fact that we even had the ability to make decisions at all, and that gave us some small sense of control over a situation which all-too-often seemed completely out of our control.  

I learned a lot during this time. I appreciated my family more. I learned to accept help from neighbors, friends and family, and I also learned the value of making tough decisions. It took a lot of time for us to get to a better place, but after 6 years, Heather is still here and healthy, despite the overwhelming odds stacked against her. I hope that our story can be a source of hope and comfort to all those currently battling cancer.

I'll end by saying remarkably brave family and I wish you the best of luck in the future. A real pleasure posting on your behalf Cameron I hope your story can indeed bring hope and comfort to those people who need it.

You know that job your doing?...Well how would you like to get paid?

So today was the day of my job interview. Being totally honest I wasn't nervous in the least, not because I was overly confident and presumed I would get the job, No quite the opposite really I had no expectations. I just felt I didn't need to put extra pressure on myself and decided to go into the interview, try my best and then let fate and of course to two very nice interviewees decide the outcome.

I had been successful in making it to the short list. Of the 240 applicants I managed to get in the last 11. I have to say I even surprised myself, it's not so much that I'm not perfectly capable of doing stuff, it's more a case of I'm overly critical of myself and just never seem to give myself credit for the majority of things...Errrr everything I do. 

Maybe I should think in a 3rd person perspective more, as if I was a good friend and give myself a well earned pat on the back now and again lol.

A couple of the senior physio's I work with had been carrying out the interviews. I suppose some may say I had an unfair advantage as I knew them through doing my voluntary work, however I don't think this is the case. The field of candidates I was up against was very strong and during my 2 months filling in in the position of assistant physio I have proven that I have learnt a huge amount in such a short space of time I'm committed,caring,determined and positive I always try to put others first whether that be patients or staff and generally act in a warm and friendly manner. Obviously this hasn't gone un-noticed and that's why I have been given this wonderful opportunity.

I was well pleased when the senior physio called and said "Hey you know that job you have been doing, well how would you like to do it and get paid"

On my way home I posted on Facebook about my good news and I have to say I was blown away by the fantastic responses I got from family and friends, offering well wishes and amazing support.

It's very weird (in a good way) to describe how I feel when people comment on how I'm "inspirational", you see I just don't see it. When I look in the mirror all I see is an ordinary bloke who has maybe had a little less luck than some, however more than others. When things go wrong in life you try to fix them and when you can't fix them you either put them to one side and let go or you move on and adapt,or there is the other option of course you just plain old simply give in. Really all I'm doing is trying the best I can with what I have,concentrating on what I can do, rather than focusing on what I can't, giving in just isn't an option. 

Anyhoo I've rambled enough, would like to end by saying a huge thank you to everyone who has passed on well wishes and support. To those people who can see something in me that still evades me...rest assured though I won't let you down...

Don't know if I'd class this as an adventure

On Friday quite out the blue I received a call from the University Hospital Durham from one of the consultants secretaries. She informed me an appointment had been made for me to see a surgical consultant on Ward 13 Surgical Admissions at 13:00. At first I didn't know who it was or what she was talking about, it wasn't until she mentioned my haematology doctor (Dr Keenan) that I sort of put two and two together.

So after finishing my voluntary work early at the RVI (12.00pm) and getting picked up by Ern (my dad), we headed off too Durham and the University Hospital.

On arriving at the hospital and getting up on the second floor and the ward, we didn't have too long to wait until I saw the consultant, Mr Baine. He gave me a quick once over and then hurried me down a corridor explaining, he was going to get to work on the large node I have in my left groin area, saying I was to come in on Wednesday and he would "chop it out". 

Mr Baine didn't come across as your usual consultant surgeon, he was quirky and I found him quite funny. I like his straight to the point way of going about things.

So what a brilliant start to 2013 huh? Two days into the New Year and here I am having more bits removed. Granted it's just another node and not a leg lol.  It will be similar surgery to the biopsy I had on my stomach in 2009 I guess.

Once the nodes out they will investigate it and I'll have to wait for more results to see what happens next.

So as soon as I know I'll up date everyone... This is all very weird to me as I'm still not entirely sure what Non Hodgkin's Lymphoma is, how I'm supposed to feel or what I'm supposed to do. Really I'm just trying to stay positive and go with the flow.

Christams Bimble, from Craster to Alnmouth and back.

I met up with Bruce (Coastkid) & Si (Doc) yesterday at Craster. Craster is situated on the cost of Northumberland to the north east of Alnwick, it's around 52 miles from where I live and roughly a hour and a half's drive away. Bruce had brought his Surly Moonlander equipped with 4.7 Surly Big Fat Larry's, whilst Si was on his Surly Pugsley equipped with 3.8 Nates which offered a lot more grip.

Weather wise the day wasn't too bad, which was surprising as according to the radio on my drive up it was supposed to be very windy and wet.

The coast line was beautiful, with some smashing trails (though the majority of trails where really hard going as they where so thick with mud). I found myself falling off a couple of times as I just had no grip and my bike slid away from under me.

I really enjoyed the ride out and back though did feel a bit guilty as both Bruce and Si had to keep waiting for me to catch up. I'm just not as fit and find some of the terrain difficult to ride. On a positive note I did manage to ride on some stuff I've never really ridden on before without getting off my bike, which is pretty scary when your clipped in and only have one leg. Stuff like slippery rocks and stretches of pebble strewn beach.

When we arrived in Alnmouth we managed to find a lovely hotel/restaurant type place, don't remember the name. Bruce, Si and myself put in an order for 3 fish and chips and Bruce and Si also got a nice refreshing bottle of Crabbies. We decided to take our meal to go, even though the lady behind the bar was very kind and said we could sit in in our muddy gear. Once outside we realised the wind was getting up and we were starting to cool off, so we took shelter in the back of the restaurant which was deserted.

One of the ales on sale in the hotel

 It was then a case of riding back to Craster, the light was starting to fade and the tide had come in so riding back along the same route wasn't possible. We followed the coastline as much as possible, using coastal trails and only really popping onto the tarmac roads on a couple of occasions to get back to the Quarry car park in Craster. At the car park was a mobile kitchen so we had a nice hot drink before saying our goodbyes.

When I got home it was a case of a hot shower and I was so worn out I went straight to bed. Don't know but over the past few months I just haven't had much energy and I can't shake this bothersome cough.

Today I decided to checkout the GoPro footage I had taken and was most disappointed in that it came out absolutely terrible. I think I need to change the settings on my GoPro as everything came out with way too much "Fish Eye", so much so the whole coastline appeared distorted and I hardly got any footage of either Bruce or Si. I think my camera needs lifting slightly on my helmet. Of course it could also have been that the majority of the time I had my head down checking to see where I was going or puffing and blowing to get along a trail/beach lol.

Looking out towards the sea

I've been trying to find software that's free/easy to use to remove the "Fish Eye" effect and also at replacement lenses for my GoPro HD2.

Settings wise I think I'll try 1080 - 25fps and either medium 127deg or narrow 90 deg for my next shoot see how that comes out.

My kids bought me a scary mask for Xmas, as if i'm not scary enough...LoL

When asked what I wanted for Christmas from my daughter and son I immediately said "Oh I'd like another bike please" obviously as they didn't have a spare £3000 I was asked would I not prefer something a little less expensive, maybe more Lynx...I use Lynx but it never seems to have the desired effect, so not much point building one of those huge boats to sail away with all the honeys now is there.

Anyhoo whilst window shopping (on the pc of course, also known as surfing) I came across these cool face masks called "AirHole" with some neat designs. 

Thought one may make a nice Christmas prezzie so put my order in with the kids. I went for the design named "Bones"

Hey maybe I'll have more luck with the mask than I do with Lynx ...Lmao :D

Checkout this cool video on Vimeo...

Decided to Re- edit yesterdays video

I was a bit bored today so decided to get up and wash my bike and  re-edit the video I took yesterday and re-upload it.

Whilst messing around with some song choices I also came up with an idea for another small movie I'd like to shoot so going to wait until the weather is a bit better and have a go at that, which should be fun.

As I've been working in Newcastle at the Royal Victoria Infirmary I've gotten to see a bit more of the "TooN" and have a nice idea for a short shoot to some rather cool music from a film I'm sure you will all have either seen or heard about, so watch this space. 

Anyhoo here is the new version of my video. If anyone has any tips or tricks on how I can make any future films I do more interesting then please feel free to offer advice. 

The Bartlett Tendon - Settings

I've now been using my new Bartlett Tendon for a good few weeks now so thought I'd write a little more on how things are going.

 Also add a little bit about some of the settings which I got from Brian Bartlett the knees designer.
 

Well first off I have to say this knee is amazing...No I'm not just saying that as I'm sponsored on the unit. Brian always requests that I be honest with him when trying out his designs as this feedback then goes on to help improve on future models. The knee is amazing in what it allows you to do as an above knee amputee. I'm now trialling the new "cam" top end on my knee and have found things have just got even better.

A lot of time and hard work has gone into making the knee work and feel something like a leg someone has lost. By work and feel I mean in it's action. With the new "cam" the movement is now smoother, with a more progressive feel (the further you flex the knee the more resistance can be felt). Instead of using a combo of hard and soft tendons, you can now leave the 2 soft tendons in place and choose how much resistance you would like by removing the "cam" locking pins and placing them in positions 1 to 3 on each "cam". Or even leaving the locking pin out completely giving you the least amount of resistance.

Here's an idea of the settings... 

The new knee is basically the same knee but with a cam instead of a wheel for the Tendons.  This will give you a softer engagement feel  to the start of your knee bend but start to ramp up into a stiffer feel towards the deeper part of the bend in the knee, this feel is also adjustable as you have four positions on each side of the knee to adjust the cam into. 

 

Here is how it works: As described by Brian Bartlett the designer of the Bartlett Tendon.

 

Position 1)  No locking pin inserted leaves the cam in the least amount of flex for the tendon and does not engage the tendon as you flex the knee because you have disengaged the locking pin; great position for road riding, snorkeling/ diving or just about anything you want to have as little tension as you can but still have something there in the end.

 

Position 2)  Top hole engaged with locking pin inserted will give you cam engagement into the tendon as the knee bends but not a lot of cam effect as for sports or applications you want to have some more tension but not enough to work against you; sports like XC skiing, road biking, XC mountain biking, SUP and any others that feel good to the users.

 

Position 3)  Middle hole in the cam engaged by locking pin inserted allowing the cam to come into the tendon more putting more pressure against it giving the user a stiffer feel at the deeper part of the knee bend;  I like this position for XC mountain biking as I have my seat up high in that application and the stiffness comes on right where I want it to as I am biking in about the 90 degree knee bend position as if I had my seat lower on the bike it might be a tad to much tension; again a lot of the same sports can apply here just depending on the users preference due to limb length and tension desired for application; Alpine skiing, snow boarding, Ice hockey, etc.

 

Position 4)  Bottom hole in the cam engaged by locking pin inserted will give you the most cam effect of Tendon tension as the knee bends moving the cam into the tendon, this will be great for DH riding, motocross, things where you want to really bend into the knee with a lot of pressure in the bottom half of the bend.

 

Here is the kicker though because you get an incredible feel to all these adjustments in the cam but these have all been tested with no air in the shock in which you'll find by just adjusting the shock a bit gives you even more tension if desired.  The next part is also that the cam is adjustable independently on each side allowing a user to adjust the cam on the right side say to hole position four and then on the left side put the cam into hole position 2 which gives a combination of tension that gives you the most natural feel for that application......you have more than twenty different ways to configure this cam for a desired cam effect.....crazy huh.

 

Also if you change the stop bushing diameter this will adjust the cam feel also as the knee will come back further in its neutral position as I like the big(15 degree) bushing in when I am utilizing the knee.

Christmas day out in the mud

Hey Merry Christmas and a very Happy New year to you all...

Since we lost my mom in 2002 we haven't really celebrated Christmas as it's kind of lost it's magic. So today I thought rather than stay in and watch more Christmas re-runs or the Queens speech I would instead head out on my bike for a while.

Yeah the weather wasn't great, but hey riding muddy trails is half the fun.

I got soaked today, yet again and found it increasingly difficult to get my winter gloves back on each time I took them off to mess with my camera, they were so wet and what with them having a double liner they got all bunched up in the fingers. Inevitably I ended up ripping the inner liners so binned them when I got home, oh dear.

I think my Canon camera is suffering because of the wet weather, can't blame the camera as it's not a water proof model, so again struggled for any shots at all.

Apart from this one...

 

  

Put together a video of today's riding...