Thoughts that go through my head when I am out for a ride.

On the farmers trail

All in all, it has been a pretty good day today. Especially as my dad is now home from hospital. You see, about ten days ago, my dad wasn't well at all. He has had a terrible cough which has been going on for months, and over the weekend leading up to the 14th of April, two days before my fifty-seventh birthday, he looked and sounded dreadful. 

On the Sunday evening before I went to bed, I was really firm with my dad, saying, "Tomorrow you must make an appointment to see a Doctor". My dad promised he would. I was working part-time on Monday, and as I drove home, I got an unexpected phone call (Don't worry I have hands-free in my car). It was wor, Kyle, "Grandad has been admitted to  hospital, I am with him now, they are carrying out tests", he went on to say. "Okay, I am coming straight through", I replied.

Upon getting to the University Hospital of North Durham and not being able to find a parking space, let alone a disabled space, I became more and more stressed and irate. Muttering to myself "I fucking hate this hospital, it's so stupid, not fit for purpose" along with a string of other tirades. You know where I ended up having to park? Fucking Greggs over at Framwellgate Moor. In fact, I parked there two days running, asking permission from the friendly staff and buying half the shop as I felt guilty.

Before I move on, I may as well stop on the parking front. One day, whilst I had entered the carpark and drove around to see if there was an available disabled spot, I saw that this lady was pulling out. I pulled just past her with the intention of then reversing in. Guess what? This fat useless fucker nipped in just as the lady pulled out. I was fuming, so I reversed back, beeped my horn as I wound my window down and said to the driver, "Did you not see I had asked the lady if she was coming out? What do you think I was parked there with my indicator on for? To which this rather obese bald bloke angrily got out of his car and said "What do you fucking think I have been waiting around there for?'. There was a quick back and forth of words, some of which I don't think I should write down here, but put it this way, one of them rhymed with "Hunt". I then had to drive back around and, fortunately, found a spot in the paid car park. Isn't it funny how you can think of a hundred more things to say that would be a lot more entertaining once you are away from a situation? For example, I may have said " You fat fuck the walk would do you good", or " Keep your hair on". I couldn't believe it when one of the fat bloke's retorts was "Errrr you old git", I mean, how did he know I was about to turn 57?

Apart from the parking, the staff over at Durham were fantastic with my dad, and by all accounts, they didn't want him to leave as he was a "star patient". So following a diagnosis of pneumonia and being on steroids, antibiotics and a fair amount of oxygen, I am pleased to say I picked my dad up for his release on Wednesday, so that is ten days he had been in. Thank God he is home and on the mend because I hate going food shopping with a passion. I may only have one leg, but I go around like the Tasmanian Devil, just chucking stuff in me basket in a "Get me out of here" fashion.

This morning, around 08:00, I thought I would pamper my dear old dad, so I made him a sausage and bacon sandwich, with a nice hot cup of coffee and brought it up to his bedroom. The pair of us then just chilled, in fact, I had a bit tinker on with the book I was writing, and then it was time for me to go and get my haircut. My dad kindly offered to take me, so I took him up on this. Man, my hair is going grey, yes, I know it is partly due to my age, however, these steroids I have been on and off since last year have played havoc with my follicles. My hair has been dropping out, and even my eyebrows are now almost all white. I feel proper old when I look in the mirror, and yet my mental age well, that is still somewhere in I would say early twenties. I guess I could dye my bits n bobs, it may make me feel better; however, then I ask myself, am I really that vain?

Coming out of the hairdresser's and having left my phone in dad's car, when I checked it, I saw that there was a new post on Facebook, written by my dad. Upon reading it, I had to swallow back the tears, as my dear old Pops had written some very kind words. Call me a big softie, I don't mind. I readily admit I can be a sensitive soul, part of which is due to certain traumatic experiences throughout life that I will always carry with me.

Upon arriving back home, I rushed to get in and have a shower. I hate the feeling when I have just had my hair cut and all the prickly little hairs are on my clothing, like around my neck, irritating me, "Ahhh, that's better".

Straight out of the shower, a quick dry, some gel in my hair, and I got to look my best as I intended, going out on my bike to attempt to get a picture to pop on the front of my aforementioned book. It didn't take me long at all to get ready, quite an achievement for me, as usually I am always searching for some specific article of mountain bike clothing or equipment.

Happy to be out

Off on my Santa Cruz Heckler,  I headed, going so far up the farmer's trail, before stopping for a photo opportunity. I have written about the farmer's trail

extensively in my book, so I thought it might make for an interesting image. I had this idea of a picture which was taken from one I had seen Sean Connery as James Bond, standing next to his Aston Martin DB5. It was shot in black & white, and I thought a similar picture would look jolly good on the front cover of my book. I mean, I am neither Sean Connery nor James Bond, but hey, people could see I rode a bike and had a unique sporting prosthetic.

Think I like this B&W for the front cover of  my book

Setting off again up the farmer's trail, I met a friendly man walking his dog, and we began having a chat about nothing in particular. We spoke for some time as we went from the back end of East Stanley all the way down into No Place, then we said our goodbyes, and I headed off down towards Beamish. Reaching Beamish, I cut down onto the C2C, passing the JCB cows and headed all the way up past Stanley and went along to Annfield Plain. I then cut in at the Morrison through the gates and fences near the power station. Gutted here as I clicked my brand new Endura jersey on some damn thorn bushes as I tried to squeeze between them and the gate post. Man, it was really, really overgrown in this area, more so than I have ever seen it, with all the whiny bushes out in bloom with yellow flowers and those dagger-like thorns.

Santa Cruz Heckler SL CC

Had to come past all the whiny bushes

Riding onto Chapman Wells where the foot and mouth cows were buried, I took a detour through another one of those large swivel-like gates, reaching my bike over the barbed wire fence. I then set up my GoPro, which seemed to take ages, to try and capture some "On the bike Shots", as I passed my camera. Total fail, I realised upon looking at the footage when I got home. All I had was about 12 images of a large tree, no Glenn or his bike insight - delete.

Over by the pond at Chapman Wells

Picturesque

I did manage to get some more shots over by the pond at Champpman Wells. On the approach to the pond at Quakies, my nose was running as it had been from the start, and me coughing, with a sense of my chest and lungs burning from this chest infection, plus with being so unfit. I suddenly became aware of an awful smell of dog shit. I stopped inspected my bike, and did that cursory thing where you try to look around at your back, just in case some of the mucky stuff had splashed up, but I couldn't see any. I rode a little further, but the smell was still there. Now I know I have been bad with my guts, but I was sure I hadn't shat myself. Never mind, by the time I reached the pond and then set off again, the smell had gone, maybe it was on one of my tyres, and the dusty trail had removed it.

Riding around, and it had been some time since my overactive imagination began whirring and words started popping into my head, somewhat like a poem of today's adventure. I have tried to recall what I was thinking and then wrote this.

  Just a little adventure

An Endless supply of drugs for an unknown disease. A string of antibiotics for a chesty wheeze.

A trip to the barbers to get my head sharpened in the same old style. It's now all old and grey, just like a vintage car its seen a fair few miles.

A ride out on my bike to clear my mind.Venturing around the same old loops searching for something new to find.

A dripping, snotty nose, wiped upon my sleeve. There goes that sodding cough again, that sounds more like a bark.

I then notice this smell that has been hanging around for at least the last half mile. I stop and check for dog shit to see if it's on my arse tyre or possiblyeven my shoe.

No horrible brown mucky fudge, but I curse nonetheless. Why do people just leave dog crap dotted around, it's even hanging in those little bags in trees.

I jump back aboard my steed and continue upon my ride. Until I come to a large pond and go to investigate and take a good few interesting snaps.

I love to be out in nature, to just relax and empty my mind. My reverie is broken, though, by the sound of some honking geese who land with an almighty splash.

Time to start off once again, I'm so pleased my ankle is holding up. It's now time for a climb up the farmer's trail, where once there was a bath.

Now at the top and heading along to Wagtail Lane, where the windmills are turning so slow. I love to hear their swooshing sound, and see the shadows of their blades.

It's now not too far from home, and a choice I have to make. Cut down by South Moor Golf Course or go the long way around.

Oh, and before I move on, I must say a huge thank you to my good, in fact, no, great mate Lee for his help in sorting out my cleats on my shoes and helping me to get in a much more comfortable position when riding my bike. Today, I didn't suffer from Achilles pain when out on the trails. I can feel a slight twinge now that I am sitting down typing this, however, it's nothing like the pain I experienced way back in December of last year when I did something to my ankle and heel.  So Lee, if you are reading this, thanks, and I will be out for a few rides with you hopefully soon.

Once at home, a quick change, and it was almost time for my weekly guitar lesson with my tutor, Tom. Tonight's session, man, I just couldn't get my head around. Sometimes I really, really do think I am as thick as two short planks. The simplest of things, and don't get me wrong, music and music theory are anything but simple, especially when you are trying to learn later in life, but at times things just go "Pheww" straight over my head, no matter how hard I concentrate or try. I am still enjoying trying, so, not about to quit. In fact, I am pretty proud that I can play along to some of my favourite songs using this app I have on my phone, called Chord AI.    

 

Once Tom had left, I began sorting out the photographs  I had taken, editing them and even placing text on the picture I had chosen to be my front cover. As for my book, I entrusted it to some friends & colleagues from work, so that they could have a read-through and help with any grammar, and punctuation and also offer feedback as to whether it is naff, interesting, or if it gets you hooked so that you want to delve deeper into my journey. So far, I have received some pretty positive feedback, and my cousin David has been an absolute superstar in practically editing, proofreading and offering advice. So a huge thank you to wor David, Sam, Jennifer, Krista,  Laura, wor Kyles's girlfriend, who both my dad and I have yet to meet, and who I haven't heard any feedback from as yet...Maybe she has read the book and now knows what a complete madman I am. Oh, and of course, The Ern, who helped me recall stories and also had the odd chuckle, so I knew I was going in the right direction.

Thank you, one and all.

Anyhoo, here is the final front cover image I have decided to go with. I also hopefully can include an inside cover that has some meaning that people will understand once the book is published. The book is 81,848 words long with 23 chapters, and I will let everyone know its pricing in the three formats I intend to have it come out in, so ebook, paperback and hardback. I wanted the hardback version as well, it will be like a sort of keepsake. Once published, I suppose I could add an author to my limited list of talents.

Lost2bFound - Glenn Johnstone

Okay, bye-bye for now.

Thoughts on a fitting front cover for my book ?

Well I think I am just about done writing and editing my book, going from roughly 40 odd thousand words to 50, and finally ending at 80,662.

I have lost count of the amount of times I have trawled through each chapter, trying to correct my spelling and grammar, and also in correcting my wording and sentences as upon reaing some stuff back, it appeared like I was dyslexic. Within the pages of my book I have attempted to use the "Geordie" vernacular, and this has also caused some issues when going through a spell checker.

At this point I don't want to give to much away, about the contents, other than to say it is about my journey through life. I am not going to make out I have had a particularlly exciting life, however I am sure some people will be able to relate to the many ups and downs within my story, and hopefully take something away from my experiences. Quite often a common shared experience can help us feel not quite so alone.

Anyhoo the reason for this particular blog post is to get some feedback from anyone who finds themself here reading this. Now last month I recieved 6572 visits to my blog, however guess how many people left a comment, or feedback, whether good, bad or indifferent, well let me tell you...Err! wait until I count them up...Oh! Yes exactly "0" a big fat Zero.

I am not sure whether people just find their way here by accident or what. Let me reassure you if you do decided to follow my blog, by using the "Follow" in the right hand margin, you will not be inundated with spam. The same goes if you comment on any posts, and as I am a bit of a technophobe I still haven't really figured out how to send notifications for anyone interested when I update my blog with a new post.

So moving on. I had thought of an idea of a front cover for my book, it was taken from an idea of an image featuring Sean Connery, as James Bond, the image being in black & white. The thing is, as I have fucked up my Achillies whilst riding my new bike, which was way back in December of last year, well I now can't head out for a ride. This means the whole scene I would have liked featured as an image, well I can't get done.

Never mind I decided to think proactively and look at an alternative source for a front cover, and decided to re-subscribe to Mid Journey and try and create something using AI. I wanted something that would relate to parts of the story of my book. Those of you who know me will know I no longer have a dog, after loosing my best mate Baxter in May of 2023, so might think "Why the Fuck has he dicided to put a Big Black Dog on the front cover of his book?. Well once I get the book self published hopefully all will become clear, and the fact I have a bloke near a cliff edge with a big black dog nearby will make sense.

Okay now this part is up to anyone who takes an interest, I guess it's a kind of poll, and I am trying to stay positive that I will get at least one more than a zero in response LoL.

Just checkout the below images and comment on which one you think looks the best for a front cover. I know I haven't given you much to go on, but there is a kind of analogy behind the images I have created using the AI. Obvioulsy I have a book title to add on the picture somewhere.

Book Cover One

Book Cover Two

Book Cover Three

Book Cover Four

Book Cover Five

Book Cover Six

Book Cover Seven

   

Book Cover Eight

Book Cover Nine

Book Cover Ten

Of course you may not like any of them and I will have to go back to the drawing board : (

First Post of 2025 - A Round up of Not Much At All

I am going to start my first post of 2025 by getting my twisting out of the way, then hopefully that way I can end on a more positive note, and not have you all thinking "Jeez this guy is a whiny git, and I have just wasted 'X' amount of time reading this shit".

  

New/2nd hand Guitar

So both my dad and myself took ill with this virus type thing that had been doing the rounds. I know the exact date I started feeling unwell, it was Saturday the 15th of December last year, yes that's right last year. To date we are both still suffering the affects either from the last bug or a new one as I write. I knew when I started feeling unwell because it was the first ride out I had on my new Santa Cruz e-bike, and I blogged about the adventure. Now I can't be certain, so to avoid being sued I'm using the word "Allegedly".The only place I was really at, which was in close contact with other people was when I went into Greggs for a bite to eat and to get a hot cuppa, so "Allegedly" I think I may have caught a bug from someone whilst visiting there. 

Following returning home I felt like I had a scratchy throat on the evening. Over the course of the next few days this got progressively worse and I eneded up feeling dreadfull. Come the Monday my poor dad had also come down with something. He would go on to spend the next 5 weeks sleeping downstairs as he was so unwell and weak, he couldn't get up off the small 2 seater couch that we have in what used to be our dining room, and is now my dad's computer room, or "shit tip" as I like to call it. Me personally I guess I am not much better, preferring to think as where ever I have my stuff, it is more like organised "Chaos", where as if you look at anywhere where my dad leaves a mark it is just "Fucking Chaos", with shit all the shop.

I am the type of bloke who some would say has a perfectonist trait, also known as a "Right pain in the arse". For instance if I get any tools I take great care to clean them and replace them back in there respective places after use. As a kid I can recall going out with my dad on "Jobs". My dad being a mechanic he would ask me to hand him say a 17mm spanner, or maybe some other specific sized socket. I would then have to go rummaging around in his tool box for the next 15 minutes or so, in search of the desired piece of equipment as everything was just piled in, one on top of another. I mean imagine you have a toolbox, okay, and then you just give it a good shake, maybe drop it a few times, and then open it to discover everything all mixed up, and "Hey Presto", you have an idea of how my dad stored his gear. Things haven't improved as both my dad and I have got older. I can tell where ever Ern sets up shop, as he is a lot like how his Father used to be and a hoarder of crap that "Might come in useful". Saying which I have to laugh as I have a terrible habit of keeping "Boxes". Like you know when you get something new? I'll say to my dad, "We had better keep the box". Depending on the size of the box, it will either go into our loft, or in some cases get shoved in the outside shed.

Anyhoo moving on, also after that first ride out on my new bike I discovered I had done something to my ankle. I only have one good leg so trying to keep off it whilst using my elbow crutches was impossible, so basically I was proper "Hobbled". My ankle, specifically my Achilles and into my heel, was proper hurting. I know I have an altered gait, due to my prosthetic limb, but now I was limping all over and could hardly walk. I tried my best to deal with the virus and this new stupid fucking pain in my ankle, but inevtitibly had to take more time off work.

I managed to get a practice nurse to come out and see my dad and whilst she was out she also gave me the once over and we were put on a course of antibiotics. Oh and I also manged to get an appointment to go and see a Physiotherapist pretty quickly. The guy I saw was spot on and gave me great advice along with some esxercises to do at home, to strengthen my painful Achillies. I was advised to keep off my bikes for a while.

So long story short, it is now February 14th a Friday as I write this. My dad and I are still unwell, with cold like symptoms and coughing. I mean I am up writing this, because I can't sleep. I have a cough, sore throat and the most awful feeling in my sinuses. It's like I want to try and clear them by sniffing then spitting the horrible mucus out, but its just stuck there.

Oh and I followed the physio's advice and hadn't been out on my bike for about 3 months. I went out for a short 3.8 mile ride, it would be about 2 weeks ago now, completing a local loop, which was pretty much on the flat, apart from the Black Path over at South Moor, and when I returned home, man my Achillies was killing me again. Infact it felt even worse than when I first did it. When ever I bend my ankle its making a "Ratcheting sound". It feels like the tendon is being dragged through the protective sheath. I have also noticed if I stand for any amount of time, like at work my heel becomes very painful. So I am now awaiting another referral, and I have to say I am feeling rather low in mood and stressed. How long this is going to take to get put right? It just feels ever since getting diagnosed with that ulcertaive colitis my body is dropping to bits. I have never expeienced as much joint pain and fatigue.

Something else that has me feeling stressed and really annoyed is the fact that I want to take part in Arctic ONE's "Tour of the Isle of Wight", which will be a sponsored bike ride. I am trying to take each day as it comes, and not feel like I have the Harbinger of dooms mindset. The ride isn't until later in the year, around September. It's just that I had been off my bike 3 months and one ride out and I am back to square "none". It's soooo! Frustrating. I don't want to be sitting around feeling sorry for myself. Since being able to take up cycling it has always been a great source of inspiration and a release of all the day to day crap. Now I am struggling I have somewhat lost my "Mojo". This means I am having to look at other things to try and keep me motivated for what I hope is the short term.

Come April I will turn 57 years of age. If it wasn't for all these niggles I reckon I would be in pretty good shape. I mean yeah I am a bit like an old building being held up by bits of scaffolding, but hey! I am still hanging in there.

Epiphone Dot Limited 2019 Aquamarine

Anyhoo I decided to treat myself to an early Birthday present. I am terrible for "Googling" especially when I am bored. This is when I tend to purchase stuff I don't really need, however convince myself I do "It will cheer me up". That and of course like in this case, and my recent purchase of a new guitar, I have this internal image of me becoming a better guitar player. Of course in reality this is most definitely not the case, as it's hard work and practice that will improve my skills, not a new guitar. I could just as easily try and improve by using any of my other 6 guitars. Never mind this particular guitar called out to me from a far, so I bought it. 

Epiphone Dot Limited 2019 Aquamarine

Epiphone Dot Limited 2019 Aquamarine

The first time I saw the guitar in question was when browsing for something completely different. There was an image of this funky looking guitar and I wasn't sure what model it was. I could see it had an Epiphone logo and that was about it. Upon searching I just popped in Epiphone and the colour of the guitar which was "Blue & Green". After sometime I discovered it was a Epiphone Dot, that was produced in a limited run, so I couldn't buy it "Brand new".

After researching the guitar I discovered it was a Epiphone Ltd Edition Dot Deluxe FM Aquamirine Semi Hollow - A stylish guitar built to the exact diemsions of a vintage 335 style semi hollow arch top.

Fortunately I saw there was one advertised as being in "Mint" condition on a music site called Reverb. I went over and had a gander at the ad, and the description of the guitar from the advert sounded like it was brand new, even though it was a 2019 model. I cheekily messaged the seller with an offer. I didn't want to come across as being a complete "Douche", so aked the seller, would they be happy knocking £25 quid off, which they very kindly agreed to do. Apparently my new guitar should be with me today, so something to look forward to. 

I am continuing to get weekly one hour lessons, and although I can see that I have progressed in my playing and knowledge, as with anything it just doesn't feel quick enough. I want to be able to just pick up my guitar and be able to play any song at will, without struggling for chord shapes or having difficulty with strumming patterns. I am still terrible with rhythm and I know I can't sing, but it would be nice to be able to at least try and get some words out as I attempt to play. I just can't concentrate on everything that is going on with the guitar and then sing along at the same time. At the moment it's beyond my concentration levels LoL. 

Oh and in other news, my time has not been completely wasted, as I am up to just under 80,000 words in my book. I just need to go over the final chapters and hopefully when I can get out on my bike get a decent photo taken, so I can use it for a front cover. I am planning on the cover being black & white and I think I have thought of a good title which ties in with the book and it's story. Publishing wise I think I am going to go down the self publishing route, however getting a company to do the leg work in the set up and distribution. All in I reckon it could cost me anywhere from £600 to £1000, which I know is a lot of money and I could potentially do it cheaper. My way of thinking is I know I probably won't recoup that kind of money in any sales, however for me just getting it out there, and done correctly will be a sense of achievement. Even if one person buys it and offers some positive feedback, saying it was funny, helpful, thoughtful or a good read, well I would be well happy.

Goodness knows when I will update my blog again. It just feels like life is on a stand still once again, with not much happening, and the things I would like to be doing are being put on hold...Ah well that is life I guess.